Narratives of fathers' experiences of the stillbirth or neonatal death of their infants

Abstract

Objective In the present study, narratives of fathers who lost children to stillbirth or neonatal death are described with regard to their experiences from during their wive's pregnancies to the present in order to gain a deeper understanding of fathers who lost children and thereby obtain suggestions for necessary care. Subjects and Method A semi-structured interview was conducted with 6 fathers who had lost children to stillbirth or neonatal death. A qualitative descriptive approach based on phenomenological research methodology was used to analyze the obtained data. Results The experiences of the fathers who lost children to stillbirth or neonatal death were grouped into the following 7 categories. 1. Shock due to the child's unexpected death. The sudden loss of the child resulted in surprise and confusion, which in turn caused psychological shock followed by feelings of helplessness and emptiness. 2. Fathers' concern for their wives and suppression of their own sorrow. Fathers were more worried about their wives, who were going through both physical and mental hardships, than their own sorrow. 3. Maintaining father and husband roles while hiding their pain. Fathers played roles as both father and husband by working on various procedures for sending off their children, while at the same time hiding their pain. 4. Social stigma and pain in daily life. Fathers were not able to express their grief due to the expectations placed on men by society, and they experienced emotional pain at society's unwillingness to recognize their grief over the children's death. 5. Wishing to know the cause of death. Fathers attempted to find meaning in their children's deaths, and tried to accept the death. 6: Continuing to be a father. Fathers had already come to love their children before the birth, and did not give up this parental role even after the death. 7. Maturing as a person. The grieving fathers "overcame the hardship on their own," acquired a new view of life and death and a new view of existence, and wished to share their experiences to help other people. Conclusion Fathers who lost children to stillbirth or neonatal death were terribly shocked by the unexpected death of their children, but continued to play roles as both father and husband after the death, while at the same time suppressing their own grief. Their unexpressed pain was overlooked by society, and sometimes went unnoticed even by the fathers themselves; however, they never forgot the children they lost. This allowed the fathers to continue being fathers and to mature as human beings.