An empathy-humility-commitment model of forgiveness applied within family dyads

Abstract

Forgiveness is described as requiring empathy for the offender, the humility to see oneself as being as fallible and needy as the offender, and courage to commit publicly to forgive. Research supports the model in individual therapy and psychoeducational groups in which the forgiver does not have to confront the offender. Family therapy, in which partners, parent-child dyads or siblings must confess their need for forgiveness and forgive face to face provides special challenges. Processes of forgiveness -empathy, humility and commitment - are understood to be the same as in any interpersonal forgiveness context; that is, they are thought to occur within dyads. Techniques compatible with several varieties of family therapies are summarized for applying the model in family therapy to encourage family members to forgive.