Being a father: A broken masculinity or a better one? An autoethnography from a first-time father perspective

Abstract

The current neoliberal society is built upon a patriarchal system in which new types of masculinities have a difficult time thriving. In this paper, I draw upon my own experiences as a Spanish neophyte father and how it shifts away from models of hegemonic masculinity. In doing so, I am forming a new model of masculinity to explore neoliberal discourses and how these determine my emotions, feelings and personal identity. Methodologically, I make use of a critical lens and an autoethnographic approach, interlinking personal and social aspects. In the results, I reflect upon a normal day in my life as a father and my relationship with my son, and the way in which it is affected by the hegemonic masculinity. The text is presented as an opportunity to rethink the importance of changing patriarchal prejudices and to deepen the knowledge of the role that masculinity plays in the paternal experience.