Navigating parenthood: A qualitative exploration of the experience of mothers with a Borderline Personality diagnosis

Abstract

Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD) diagnosis has been associated with challenges in parenting and parents with this diagnosis may be overrepresented in coming to the attention of children’s social care services. However, little is known about these parents’ perspectives on parenthood. In this study, we, therefore, explored in depth the parenting experiences of eight mothers who had been given a BPD diagnosis and had young children. Semi-structured interviews were conducted with eight mothers and analysed using Interpretative Phenomenological Analysis (IPA). All mothers described experiences of early adversity and trauma which left them lacking positive parental role models and grappling with a desire to give their children a better start in life than their own. They felt isolated in their parenting role and described negative intrusive thoughts, along with intense anxieties about bad things happening to them or their children. This contributed to feeling overprotective of their children, seeking close physical proximity with them, and experiencing difficulties setting boundaries. Several experienced ambivalent feelings towards their children, yet they often found comfort in the developing bond with their child and enjoyed playful interactions together. This research highlights the impact of early adversity and trauma on mothers’ experiences of parenting. We suggest that mothers with BPD diagnoses and children’s social care involvement face many challenges in their parenting role. Services need to consider how best they can support this population in a trauma-informed way, especially as the risk of child removal may exacerbate parents’ anxieties and distress.