The Goldilocks phenomenon: an autobiographical inquiry into becoming EFL teacher educators

Abstract

This study explored the pathways to becoming a teacher educator, experiences of (il)legitimacy as an educator, and how teacher educators learn to become educators. The Deleuzo-Guattarian perspective of Beings and Becomings framed the understanding of their professional journey, highlighting the tension between expected and evolving educator identities. Using autobiographical narrative research, six English as a Foreign Language teacher educators shared their experiences over a year through written prompt-based narratives. Findings revealed that becoming a teacher educator is an unintended journey shaped by experiences, reflections, education, and research. Narratives showed that educators’ legitimacy fluctuated through interactions with various actors in the education system, leading to contradictory feelings that their qualifications and knowledge were never enough, yet they still developed an increasing sense of competency. This was termed the ‘Goldilocks phenomenon’. The study challenges current review processes and suggests a need for a different perspective on professional development needs.