Ready (for love) or not? Self and other perceptions of commitment readiness and associations with attachment orientations

Abstract

Commitment readiness – feeling ready to be in a committed relationship – is conducive to romantic relationship initiation and maintenance. Further, friends’ perceptions of whether someone is ready might constrain the opportunities afforded to individuals, and these perceptions may be shaped by how people navigate a romantic relationship, namely, attachment orientation. Hence, we examined the overlap of self and other perceptions of commitment readiness and whether those perceived as insecurely attached were also perceived as not ready for commitment. Persons in groups (N = 193) consisting of four friends each (N = 772) rated themselves and their friends on commitment readiness and attachment orientations. Using a bivariate social relations model, we found strong self-other agreement on commitment readiness. We also found that people perceived as higher in attachment avoidance and anxiety were seen as not as ready for commitment. Finally, people’s judgments of their own commitment readiness were associated with how they judged their friends’ commitment readiness (i.e., assumed similarity). Implications about the consequences of interpersonal judgments among friends are discussed.